Snarkastic

The Quality of Mercy at 29K

It's only just hitting me that the show went up tonight, that people came, a lot of people, that there were only four empty seats in the house, and that they laughed. And that when it was all over, they stood up and clapped. A lot. I could do shows over and over again with these six wonders.

Now I'm home again. Joan and I are cutting and watering our new flowers. Jay's running around in a bridal veil and a Planet Hollywood shirt, telling stories about picketing abortion clinics at the age of eight in a Romanian accent. So things are pretty much back to normal.

For those who couldn't be there, and since we didn't have proper programs, here are the bios from the show, with apologies and ™s to Peyton Reed, Vanessa Williams, Beyonce, SNL, William Shakespeare, TWoP writer Wing Chun, MC Chris, the classic children's television program Are You Afraid of the Dark?, and the films Matinee and Red Dawn:

RC
is one fine piece of sweet potato pie, but with fewer marshmallows and more carbohydrates. He smells nice and is good-looking in a non-threatening way. Sometimes the snow comes down in June; sometimes the sun goes 'round the moon. Do not feed RC after midnight. RC loves his real girlfriend, his pretend wife, and Juicy Juice. Tonight, he will be your naughty girl.

Joan
may or may not be A Shark™. This marks her second appearance in WASP, her fifth production on the Lab stage, and her 27th production overall. Joan likes zombies, Cheez-Its, and the American buffalo. She is the proud owner of a 4-foot-tall fuchsia octopus named Squidley that loves to love her, baby. She hearts her moo, her friends, and her castmates. Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society...WASP. ROO! Joanie loves Chachi. Joan is pretty. Her backpack's got jets. Meh!

John
is happy to still be here and alive on the Lab stage. You may or may not know (and if you don't, For Shame!) that John played Romeo, which is, like, the lead and title character, in Romeo and Juliet on the CBT mainstage. (He lobbied unsuccessfully to have the title changed to Romeo!! No, seriously.) John would like to thank his castmates, and insists that you do not speak directly to Romeo. "Any second the Mant will come out of the screen, I swear!!"

Elyse
is in her first Lab Theatre production. She feels very honored to be in this production, and is the only freshman that sleeps in Joan's bed (with Squidley). She has become a permanent leech in Holly's refrigerator with her taco-flavored kisses. She gets her classic good looks from her Real Mother, Joan. She bounty hunts for Jabba Hutt to finance her 'Vette. Her favorite pastimes include dancing and warbling in her Chewbacca voice.

JP
is very good to have did this play! This is a good play like some of the other plays he has did such as WASP. He is happy. JP would like to thank Orchus. You may have seen him asleep, in bed, drunk, and desperate without a hope or a leg to stand on, and in the TV show The Ring! JP is an English major. No, I know!! "Wolverines!! Avenge me!!"

Big Evil
is a recent transplant from the Pacific Northwest, via the University of Hawaii (and no, he's not Hawaiian). You may recognize him from his successful line of cleaning products ("It just looks wet!"), or his time as Lollipop Fluffer and Stunt Head in Kojak: The Musical. Big Evil is also a nationally ranked gymnast specializing in the pommel horse. He would like to thank Chuck Norris, Gillette, and his personal shaver Bobo.

Holly
is ten feet tall, bulletproof, and Silently Judging You. If you want to stop her, you'll have to kill her, and she doesn't think you've got the grapes. She loves snark, October, boys, contempt, Robert Rodriguez, West Coast offense, and kickin' it promo-style. She believes in Friday night lights, the three-step drop, and the power of an elegant turn of phrase and a grin. Holly chills in deep space and endorses Tang, the drink of astronauts. All her love to the Hive, her castmates, and her eucalyptus trees, who know who they are. Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, she calls this story...Sleepover of the Damned. Developing...

I don't have a single picture from today. But something tells me I won't forget.

"It was like church. I didn't know we could do that. Did you?"
"When I forget, something usually reminds me."

Posted by Nastinchka at September 26, 2004 11:51 PM