Merry Chrishmoos:
3:39:37 PM nastinchka (Autoreply): Christmas Eve with the outlaws. I'm packing heat (where "heat" implies "dinosaur robot").
Nastinchka (15:16:09): When do you leave for Poland?
Eegah820690903 (15:17:08): umm, I'll be advancing through the Czech lands by train, narrowly averting my own capture. I'll make it to the Czech/Polish border, cross on foot, walk to a bus station, and then get my bus to whatever this town is called.
Eegah820690903 (15:17:19): What could go wrong?
Eegah820690903 (15:18:22): yeah. we were dealing with so much stuff at the end of the summer that I didn't get a check card. The money I brought with me was spent on LSD and fanta, and now I'm waiting for a package that should be here tomorrow. Or I will be very grumpy
Eegah820690903 (15:19:12): Poland will be fun, but I really should be in O-Town or K- Town throwing back shots of my big black clock and chillin' with Team Zissou
Eegah820690903 (15:20:22): did I just say big black clock? Jesiz Christ
Nastinchka (15:20:41): How very Continental of you, old chap.
It's the degeneration from high-minded political grandstanding to gurgles that makes it Art:
8:53:15 PM nastinchka: What's this about working on Das Hill?
8:53:42 PM jangel139: well, that's where I want to work next summer
8:53:43 PM jangel139: .... I think
8:53:47 PM nastinchka: Awesome.
8:54:29 PM jangel139: but do I want to work there bad enough to work for The Devil? like, should I apply to work for bill Frist - his internship program is one of the better ones but I Hate Him And Everything He Stands For
8:54:37 PM nastinchka: NO.
8:54:40 PM nastinchka: NO, Joy.
8:54:46 PM nastinchka: It's called Work.
8:54:54 PM nastinchka: It would be your JOB, YOUR JOB to advance his agenda.
8:55:03 PM nastinchka: His agenda of hate and fear and discrimination.
8:55:25 PM nastinchka: And even if he weren't evil, you shouldn't take any job that's against your principles that much.
8:55:31 PM nastinchka: There are Other Internships.
8:55:32 PM nastinchka: No.
8:55:33 PM nastinchka: No.
8:55:34 PM nastinchka: no.
8:55:45 PM nastinchka: Also, I know two kids who went through it, and they said it wasn't all that.
8:55:52 PM nastinchka: *deep breath*
8:55:53 PM nastinchka: No.
8:59:08 PM nastinchka: *crickets*
8:59:13 PM nastinchka: .....*pet*
8:59:40 PM jangel139: hehe
8:59:54 PM jangel139: I wasn't talking because I was copy pasting that to everyone who asked me why I thought working for Frist would be compromising my morals
9:00:38 PM nastinchka: Bawwww.
9:00:49 PM jangel139: I do love you.
9:00:52 PM nastinchka: Yeah. There are eight billion internships in DC.
9:00:54 PM jangel139: you're very good at saying the things I can't.
9:00:58 PM nastinchka: I love you a very lot much.
9:01:12 PM nastinchka: That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me. I'm serious.
9:01:26 PM jangel139: well I meant it.
9:01:42 PM nastinchka: Ah luuuuuuv yew.
9:02:00 PM jangel139: ahhhhhh luuuuv yewww I honestly luuuuv yeeeeew
9:02:09 PM nastinchka: Roo are my sunshine.
9:02:22 PM jangel139: skinamarink a dink a dink, skinamarink a doo, I love roooo
9:02:38 PM nastinchka: Every time roo go awaaaaay
9:02:47 PM nastinchka: Roo take a piece of meee (skin) with roo
9:03:00 PM jangel139: damn straight I do
9:03:34 PM jangel139: your alabaster skin
9:03:39 PM jangel139: untouched by the sun's rays
9:03:47 PM nastinchka: Joan and I spent the better part of the ballgame last night coming up with Christmas carols that involve eating people's skin.
9:04:32 PM nastinchka: ...hello?
9:04:49 PM nastinchka: Not YOUR skin.
9:04:45 PM jangel139: oh you think you can scare me away that easily?
9:04:47 PM jangel139: wroooong
9:04:51 PM nastinchka: Good.
9:07:11 PM jangel139: not my pretty (mostly translucent) (even though I'm fucking Italian) skin
9:07:37 PM nastinchka: Not that, no.
Joan went away (6:49:21)
Away Message: I heard this terrifying peal of thunder directly outside my window, and my first thought was not "Oh, thunder" but "SITH LORDS ATTACKING IN THE RIGHT QUADRANT LIGHTSABERS OUT FORCE BE WITH" and then I realized it was thunder and I kind of laughed to myself, but really my hand was still clenched around my flashlight that I was going to use as a lightsabre. Have a nice night.
8:43:25 PM nastinchka (Autoreply): Recovering from my night of blackout drinking with my boss's boss's bosses. At $75 a glass, you'd think Caymus would make you invincible. You would be painfully wrong.
8:30:37 AM ortwaddle: i was trying to think of a christmas present to give _____. (i figure it's probably not a bad idea.) i want it to be relatively low-key, so i'm going to see what plays are going to be showing in january. but those tickets will be in the second envelope
8:30:53 AM ortwaddle: in the first envelope will be tickets to the gun show. *fleeeex*
9:16:02 AM nastinchka: ...If you abandon hard science, I get to call you lazy, right?
9:17:06 AM nicodemus055: Feel free to, but if I'm getting an MPP at the Kennedy School your teasing won't be too hard to bear.
9:18:38 AM nastinchka: Yeah, but see, in exchange, you get to be, if possible, Even More Insufferable than before. When you debate a point in your current field, you're a lot more likely to be able to back up your position with numbers. This way you can twirl a lock of hair, assume a lofty pose, and intone something about nuances that no one will be able to challenge with empirical proof. What fun!
12:49:00 PM liviaharlowe: HOW DO YOU EFF UP A HALLOWEEN PARTY
12:49:20 PM liviaharlowe: its okay, by doing this, they are making our reign look so much more impressive
12:49:41 PM nastinchka: I know, right?
12:50:02 PM liviaharlowe: remember OUR last 2 halloween parties?
12:50:10 PM nastinchka: Blurrily.
12:51:11 PM liviaharlowe: US: Debauched table dancing at kilt-clad Ferguson's house. THEM: Dreary small talk at the appetizer table
12:51:43 PM liviaharlowe: US: Bloodsoaked romp through Castle Greyskull THEM: Milquetoast viewing of heavily-edited Halloween on TBS
12:51:47 PM nastinchka: Us: Sugar shock and alcohol poisoning.
12:51:59 PM nastinchka: Them: Wine coolers and Tostitos.
12:53:46 PM liviaharlowe: US: attempted rape by drunken professor, followed by stripteasing on trampoline THEM: no attempted rape, because no one looks pretty, and no trampoline.
12:54:33 PM nastinchka: Us: Operation Sleep It Off. Them: Operation Well, I Better Go, I Have A Midterm at 9.
12:54:36 PM nastinchka: Amateurs.
12:54:48 PM liviaharlowe: I KNOW
12:54:58 PM liviaharlowe: remember our ginormous haul of candy?
12:55:07 PM liviaharlowe: that was incredible, and the best idea we EVER had.
12:56:15 PM liviaharlowe: how did people fall for that
12:56:21 PM nastinchka: We're cute.
12:56:27 PM liviaharlowe: good times.
1:11:23 PM liviaharlowe: love my duckie!!
1:11:31 PM nastinchka: EW
1:11:42 PM nastinchka: I had totally forgotten about that voice. Thanks a fucking lot.
1:11:50 PM liviaharlowe: jay left it on my voicemail yesterday
1:11:54 PM liviaharlowe: its like the ring, i have to pass it on
1:12:02 PM nastinchka: WE SHOULD TAKE HIM TO THE MAZE
1:12:11 PM liviaharlowe: RIGHT HOLLY
1:12:13 PM liviaharlowe: RIGHT
1:12:20 PM nastinchka: I'M SERIOUS
1:12:39 PM liviaharlowe: SO WHEN HE GETS LOST AND WE FIND HIM WHIMPERING AND NAKED IN A BED OF CORNSTALKS, WE CAN BE THE ONES WHO HAVE TO WRAP HIM UP IN OUR SWEATERS AND STROKE HIS HAIR AND TAKE HIM HOME
1:12:54 PM nastinchka: HOW IS THAT NOT FUN?
1:13:04 PM liviaharlowe: ITS A BRAND NEW SWEATER
Nastinchka (Autoreply): Gah. Flat on my back in bed with a Tummy Bug. Entertain me.
Big Evil: You didn't look flat on your back when I left... oh, wait. *grin*
Nastinchka: Grrrrr.
Nastinchka: Animals are dangerous when cornered or injured. My Tummy Hurts. Rarrrrr.
Big Evil: *hiding*
3:31:19 PM nastinchka: Also, I love your Colts comment.
3:33:23 PM liviaharlowe: it makes me SO ANGRY when people are like "you only support the colts because they're winning!" and i want to scream "johnny unitas is my mom's godfather! and my grandfather was the team photographer!" in their FAT FACES.
8:17:22 PM nastinchka: Hey, we're social pioneers in this thing. There will be casualties. It's like the Oregon Trail, only with marginally less cholera.
8:17:45 PM alateinertia: only marginally though
3:25:22 PM nastinchka: Ok, you have to change your profile to say we're married or it won't work.
3:25:39 PM liviaharlowe: I WANT TO MARRY MR SHEFFIELD
3:25:49 PM liviaharlowe: CHANGE YOUR NAME TO MAXWELL SHEFFIELD
3:25:52 PM nastinchka: ....I could change my name? On Facebook?'
3:25:55 PM liviaharlowe: ...NOT ON FACEBOOK...
3:25:58 PM liviaharlowe: IN REAL LIFE
3:26:07 PM nastinchka: God, and I was SURE you would recoil in horror at the suggestion.
3:27:21 PM liviaharlowe: do it.
3:27:22 PM liviaharlowe: NOW.
3:27:46 PM nastinchka: On my way to the courthouse.
3:29:06 PM liviaharlowe: there. we're married. I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY
3:29:48 PM nastinchka: We can leave this up long enough to draw shrieks from our supplicants, then move on to Elijah and Andrew McCarthy.
3:30:01 PM liviaharlowe: it wont let us marry non-facebookies.
3:30:09 PM nastinchka: Selfishes.
3:30:09 PM liviaharlowe: JUST LIKE THE SUPREME COURT.
3:30:26 PM nastinchka: Is facebook saying all non-collegiates are gay??
3:30:45 PM nastinchka: because if they think no sodomy has resulted from their project, they are egregiously misinformed.
3:31:11 PM liviaharlowe: Seriously. Ask D____.
9:36:23 PM nastinchka: I'm a baking dervish, but I'll be back at laptop intermittently.
10:32:55 PM jangel139: a baking dervish?
10:32:56 PM nastinchka: Baking, dervishly. Am attempting my late grandmother's cursed coconut cake (recipe cursed, not cake). It's like the tower of Babel, but with simple syrup. V. scruffy. Still not king.
10:33:03 PM jangel139: is that related to the whirling kind?
10:37:21 PM nastinchka: yesh
10:51:37 AM nastinchka: THAT's a new one.
10:51:38 AM ortwaddle (Autoreply): You must be a snake charmer, because you make these pythons want to dance.
10:52:00 AM ortwaddle: yeah. they get better. check out what i said to micki on date numero dos:
10:52:10 AM ortwaddle: "i'm glad you're a vet student, 'cause these pythons are sick."
10:52:44 AM ortwaddle: i know. i kill myself with humor sometimes.
10:57:31 AM ortwaddle: you'd be surprised at how amazed some people get when they find out how many of these i know
10:57:39 AM ortwaddle: ...then again, you probably wouldn't be
10:57:42 AM nastinchka: Nope.
10:59:36 AM ortwaddle: how about this? "i just got invited to multi-party talks at the white house. they want to talk about disarming these nukes." *flexes*
10:59:44 AM nastinchka: Wow.
10:59:46 AM ortwaddle: needs work, i know, but that's off the top of my head
11:00:13 AM ortwaddle: "gas prices going up sure depress the hell out of me. means i've gotta pay more to fuel these diesels."
11:00:38 AM ortwaddle: "i'm suing nbc. i mean, i trademarked the name for law and order here." *flexing alternate arms*
11:01:20 AM ortwaddle: "i'm gonna get a couple of tats right here. [point to quads] big dollar signs for the money makers."
11:01:30 AM ortwaddle: it's fun to pretend to be that self-involved.
11:01:45 AM ortwaddle: (the obvious joke from you would be, "pretend?" but we'll take that as read, ok?)
11:02:07 AM nastinchka: Already done.
11:02:16 AM ortwaddle: good
11:05:11 AM nastinchka: "KNow why they haven't found Osama? Cause he's hiding behind this ROCK!" (flexes)
11:05:28 AM ortwaddle: AH HAHAHAHAHAHA. and now for the ctrl + v
5:43:35 PM liviaharlowe: GOTH TWEEN GIRL AT MALL #1: Do you have the Satanic Bible?
5:43:58 PM liviaharlowe: JOAN: No, we don't have it in stock.
5:43:58 PM liviaharlowe: GOTH TWEEN GIRL AT MALL #2: ...RACISTS.
7:05:51 PM liviaharlowe: how is princess grace?
7:09:06 PM nastinchka: Stalky.
7:09:11 PM liviaharlowe: thats so creepy
7:09:17 PM nastinchka: I know, right?
7:09:24 PM liviaharlowe: i want to watch grace and little adolf jr. fight
7:09:31 PM nastinchka: SHE NAMED IT ADOLF???
7:09:33 PM liviaharlowe: NO
7:09:43 PM liviaharlowe: but its not exactly outside the realm of possibility, is it?
7:09:49 PM nastinchka: No, not At All.
7:31:00 PM liviaharlowe: SEAN: Where's my coat?
MOM: Over there.
JOAN: Use your eyes, kid.
SEAN: I don't HAVE to use my eyes! I'M AN AMERICAN!
(Long, pregnant pause)
SEAN: ...My forefathers died so I wouldn't have to use my eyes.
7:32:15 PM liviaharlowe: he makes me so proud.
2:36:33 PM nastinchka: I have the Best Idea Ever, Ever.
2:36:41 PM nastinchka: (Best = Worst.)
2:36:42 PM jangel139: oh?
2:36:47 PM jangel139: obvi.
2:36:52 PM nastinchka: So I cannot stop thinkking about hideously inapt shows for Morristown to do now that they don't have Chicago or Peter Pan.
2:37:38 PM nastinchka: And one of the first I thought of was, obviously, Miss Saigon.
2:37:38 PM jangel139: oh no..
2:37:53 PM nastinchka: Because they've never seen an Asian person in their provincial lives.
2:38:01 PM jangel139: right, because nothing says Good Theatre like a helicopter crashing to the stage and killing the cast.
2:38:04 PM nastinchka: And then I moved on to other shows.
2:38:15 PM nastinchka: But then I came back to Miss Saigon.
2:38:29 PM nastinchka: Because of six words that won't get out of my head:
2:38:40 PM jangel139: oh no ...
2:38:50 PM nastinchka: "And A_____ C_________ as The Helicopter".
2:39:00 PM jangel139: oh no.
2:39:12 PM nastinchka: Oh, yes.
2:39:16 PM jangel139: DON'T YOU LAUGH
2:39:19 PM jangel139: DON'T YOU EVER LAUGH
2:39:22 PM nastinchka: The whisk ballet was only the beginning
2:39:39 PM nastinchka: DON'T LAUGH OR I'LL CUT YOU WITH MY METAPHYSICAL ROTOR BLADES OF BALLETIC PRECISION
2:39:40 PM jangel139: I can see how he can go from playing The Rug to playing The Helecopter.
2:39:57 PM nastinchka: ....with a capital Hell.
2:40:09 PM jangel139: it's so true.
2:40:14 PM nastinchka: Seriously. A______ would stage a fucking dream ballet around the helicopter.
2:40:28 PM nastinchka: Which is the kind of thing that I would do, true,but I would do it ironically.
12:44:27 PM nastinchka: Kisses
12:44:33 PM liviaharlowe: bye
12:44:37 PM liviaharlowe: excuse me
12:44:38 PM liviaharlowe: BAAAAAAAAAH
12:44:43 PM nastinchka: gaaaaaaaaaaaagbgbgbgbbg
12:44:51 PM nastinchka: (gurgle)
12:44:57 PM liviaharlowe: chhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
12:45:00 PM nastinchka: gnnnnnnnnnnnnn
12:45:03 PM liviaharlowe: (hiss)
12:45:10 PM nastinchka: ....miaow?
12:45:11 PM liviaharlowe: k
12:45:11 PM liviaharlowe: go now.
12:45:16 PM nastinchka: rarrrr!!!!
12:45:18 PM nastinchka: ...kay.
12:45:20 PM liviaharlowe: IM SO ICY
12:45:27 PM nastinchka: WE WANT PRENUP
12:45:31 PM nastinchka: No, YOU hang up
12:45:32 PM liviaharlowe: JESUS WALKS WITH ME
12:45:36 PM nastinchka: with me
12:45:37 PM nastinchka: with me
12:45:39 PM nastinchka: with me
12:45:40 PM liviaharlowe: (with me)
12:45:41 PM nastinchka: ch ch ch ch
12:45:48 PM nastinchka: he he he he he
12:45:50 PM nastinchka: ha ha ha ha ha
12:45:54 PM liviaharlowe: GOD
12:45:55 PM liviaharlowe: JUST LEAVE
12:46:01 PM nastinchka: fa la la la la la la la
12:46:04 PM nastinchka: [scene]
Posted by Nastinchka at December 26, 2005 07:32 PM