Snarkastic

Did you have a coupon?

Got it for $199 with a rebate (and the new contract that was required to switch to a CA plan).

But how will your internet stalkers bother you in real life?

Oh.

Yeah, there's a reason (well, four or five reasons) I'm not getting the number forwarded.

An L.A. phone number is the first step.

Next you'll be ordering a half double decaffeinated half-caf, with a twist of lemon.

That lemon-in-coffee thing is inexplicable and gross. (That said: Do I order my chai with soy milk? Busted.)

obscure L.A. Story quote. Ever seen it?

I think you need to live in LA to appreciate that movie.

Ages and ages ago, but the lemon thing is real.

Do you mean lemon as in "small piece of lemon rind in one's espresso," or as in "big lump of lemon in a cup of regular"? The first one is splendid but the second one would confuse me. Not terribly challenging, though.

It's so blue and rectangly! Wheeee!

while the coffee in california sucks balls, i must admit, i'm a sucker for all-you-can-eat sushi.

PDA phones confuse the hell out of me. Putting in anything more than a phone, camera, and a text messaging function means I won't use those features.

Palms, BlackBerrys, and Treos are the one technological item I'll never, ever be able to comprehend.

i'ma doin' the drive today, so feel free to call and entermatain me along the way.