Snarkastic

Laff Riot 48: Touchdown.

Yeah, there's not really a way to preface this one.

Joe (2:33:22 AM): before you go
Joe (2:33:35 AM): would you help me write a love song between tebow and joiner

Livia (2:34:41 AM): "Please Tell Me I Got Both Feet In (In The Endzone Of Your Heart)"
Livia (2:36:26 AM): alternate title: "How Can There Be A Penalty When I Hold You (In My Arms)"
Joe (2:37:22 AM): We really could release a new song every week until the SEC championship
Livia (2:37:43 AM): im pretty sure tebow would put them on his ipod and play them pregame and then win a heisman trophy
Joe (2:38:21 AM): we'd have to throw in a break-up song before the really important games
Livia (2:38:50 AM): "Too Many Men On The Field"
Joe (2:39:33 AM): I Saw You Looking Downfield (When My Heart Was Wide Open)
Livia (2:43:03 AM): "I Thought Our Love Would Split The Uprights (Instead, It Sailed Wide Left)"
Livia (2:43:34 AM): "You Got A Hand On The Ball Of My Heart"
Livia (2:44:20 AM): Half The Distance To The Goal (But You've Grown Distant Lately Too)
Livia (2:46:13 AM): Fourth And Inches, So Close I Can Feel You
Joe (2:47:08 AM): You Had Me at Down, Set, Hut
Livia (2:47:35 AM): You Can Change The Play, But You Can't Change How I Feel
Joe (2:47:57 AM): I Took the Snap (to be Closer to You)
Livia (2:48:18 AM): If You Were My Sacker (I'd Take The Sack)
Joe (2:48:43 AM): At the Bottom of the Pile-up
Livia (2:49:15 AM): Stopped For A Loss (Baby Please Come Home)
Joe (2:49:34 AM): Don't Punt my Heart
Livia (2:50:12 AM): Squib Kick Quick Kiss (that one is totally a dance anthem)
Livia (2:51:01 AM): Scrambling Out Of My Arms
Livia (2:51:52 AM): I Read Your Defenses (And Brought Them All Down)
Joe (2:52:24 AM): Did You Hear My Audible (I Love You)
Livia (2:52:40 AM): the gentle whisper....i love you!
Livia (2:54:17 AM): I've got the title and cover art for our CD. it's tebow and joiner with the back of their jerseys to the cameras, side by side, hands loosely entwined, looking at the game clock, which says 00:01, and the title reads "EFFECTIVE COCK MANAGEMENT"
Livia (2:54:39 AM): "brought to you by urban meyer"
Joe (2:54:49 AM): Effective Cock Management
Joe (2:55:00 AM): A Love Story
Livia (2:55:28 AM): If Our Love Was Picked On Gameday (We Would Be Favored)
Joe (2:56:31 AM): Herbstreit (Don't Take My Man Just Because You Can)
Livia (2:57:15 AM): Dolly Parton would cameo on that one.
Livia (2:59:21 AM): Roughing The Passer (But That's How He Likes It)
Livia (2:59:39 AM): You Intentionally Grounded Our Love
Livia (3:00:48 AM): You're Converting For Two (And You Are The One)
Joe (3:01:42 AM): Our Love is Offsides (But You are Inside Me)
Livia (3:01:57 AM): You Safetied Me (But I Feel Safe With You)
Joe (3:02:59 AM): I Get an Onsides Kick Out Of You
Livia (3:03:04 AM): Don't You Lateral Love Away
Livia (3:03:29 AM): If You Ever Fumble, I'll Be There To Recover You
Livia (3:04:37 AM): You Had Clear Possession (Of My Heart)
Livia (3:04:46 AM): After Careful Review, Our Love Stands
Livia (3:05:24 AM): Irrefutable Video Evidence Has Overturned Our Breakup
Livia (3:06:31 AM): When Life Throws A Challenge Flag, I'll Be Beside You
Livia (3:07:45 AM): There's An Ineligible Receiver (In Your Heart)
Joe (3:07:46 AM): My Heart's Been Given a Sideline Warning (It Cares So Much For You)
Livia (3:08:39 AM): If You Look At Another Man (I'll Eject Him From The Game)
Livia (3:08:53 AM): Unnecessary Roughness On My Emotions
Livia (3:09:32 AM): Injury Timeout, While The Trainers Look At What's Left Of My Heart
Livia (3:10:29 AM): You Blew The Play Of Our Love Dead
Joe (3:10:49 AM): You Better Wear Protection (Cause I'm Coming After You)
Livia (3:11:25 AM): Un-Facemask My Heart (And Face)
Joe (3:12:39 AM): The Playbook of My Heart's Got Nothing Left
Livia (3:12:54 AM): Spike The Ball, But Don't Spike What We Have
Joe (3:13:48 AM): Our Love is on 4th Down (Why Don't You Go For It)
Livia (3:14:12 AM): Any Team You're On Is A Special Team For Me
Livia (3:14:57 AM): Goal Line Stand (But Not Just One Night)
Livia (3:15:43 AM): Gatorade Bath (Looks Like We Made It)
Livia (3:15:56 AM): That Ref Is Blind If He Can't See Our Love
Livia (3:16:09 AM): When It Comes To You (There Is No Out Of Bounds)
Joe (3:16:37 AM): retraction: Don't Give Me Your Back-up Story ('Cause My Heart is on Third String)
Joe (3:17:24 AM): My Knee is Down (Will You Be Mine?)
Livia (3:17:43 AM): Group Tackle (But All I See Is You)
Livia (3:18:27 AM): I Lost The Ball (I Can't Lose You Too)
Joe (3:19:11 AM): I'll Always Be There (To Put Your Jersey Back Over Your Shoulder Pads)
Livia (3:19:16 AM): Neutral Zone Infraction (When I Look Into Your Eyes)
Joe (3:24:05 AM): I'm Waving My Arms (Cause You're The Fairest Catch Of Them All)
Livia (3:24:52 AM): Down At The Line of Scrimmage That Is My Soul
Livia (3:29:34 AM): False Start (Fairy Tale Finish)
Livia (3:30:51 AM): IT IS THREE THIRTY IN THE MORNING?!?!?!
Livia (3:30:54 AM): I HAVE TO GO TO BED.
Joe (3:30:59 AM): But
Joe (3:31:01 AM): if you go
Joe (3:31:35 AM): who's going to sing, The Media Timeout of Our Love
Livia (3:31:27 AM): Don't Let the Clock Run Out (On What We Have)
Livia (3:32:15 AM): You Are The Pontiac Gamechanging Performer Of My Life
Joe (3:32:16 AM): I Gave Him His Two Minute Warning (and I've Never Seen Him Since)
Posted by Nastinchka at October 5, 2007 10:40 AM