Snarkastic

Laff Riot 51: Abigail Adams: Patriot, Mother, Bitch.

9:11:36 PM Livia: jay and i are going to endless shrimp tomorrow
9:11:54 PM Nastinchka: Whose purse will be lined with aluminum foil? I have to know.
9:12:05 PM Livia: if he can somehow eat more coconut shrimpies than me, that will be the equivalent of stanford-usc
9:12:14 PM Livia: Stewart's.
9:12:23 PM Nastinchka: I expect a call.
9:13:13 PM Livia: I expect to remove my own appendix in the Red Lobster bathroom to make more room for shrimp.
9:13:25 PM Nastinchka: You're a soldier, baby.
9:13:37 PM Livia: We ride together, we die together.
9:13:52 PM Livia: Remember when Jay and I went through that phase where we composed different shrimp-themed musical numbers?
9:14:04 PM Nastinchka: HOW COULD I FORGET.
9:14:15 PM Nastinchka: Not my driving a shrimp fork into my eardrum, believe me.
9:14:41 PM Livia: The highlight was either "Shrimp! Unh! Good God, y'all! What is it good for? Absolutely EVERY-THING" or "There's a place for shrimp/A time and place for shrimp"
9:16:29 PM Livia: "Get a fork and we're halfway there/ Get your purse and I'll meeeeeeeet you theeeeeeeeere"
9:16:50 PM Nastinchka: scampi and garlic and baaaaatter fried
9:16:53 PM Nastinchka: cooococut
9:16:57 PM Nastinchka: and BUUUUUUTTERFLIIEED
9:16:59 PM Nastinchka: *dance break*
9:17:12 PM Nastinchka: (3/4 time dance break)
9:17:18 PM Livia: (Puerto Rican clapping)
9:17:27 PM Nastinchka: (5/4 time dance break)
9:17:41 PM Livia: (sound of jerome robbins popping pills)

6:03:02 PM TC: I was involved in a conversation similiar to that (less the necromancy) in college, and I was the only one weirded out by it, and no one could figure out why I wasn't playing along as much, until one of them blurted out "Oh, RIGHT: you think it's a SACRAMENT! Hahahaha!"
6:03:28 PM TC: Oh, Catholic upbringing, will you never stop making my life awkward?

0:31:55 PM Nastinchka: Guess what ABC West aired instead of Notre Dame?
10:32:08 PM Nastinchka: Degrassi Next Generation Marathon.
10:32:12 PM Swindle: No
10:32:15 PM Nastinchka: YES.
10:32:21 PM Swindle: Unholy
10:32:25 PM Nastinchka: I did not get to see the carnage.
10:32:37 PM Nastinchka: Last year instead of USC Nebraska I got Suite Life of Zack and Cody.
10:32:38 PM Swindle: I've been drinking heavily
10:32:51 PM Nastinchka: It could not have been gayer if they had aired That's So Raven.
10:33:11 PM Swindle: Or the fourth quarter of Tennessee-Florida.

7:38:00 PM 'Box: I thought you hated the Poke feature. Also, I forgot to mention this to you, probably because I've been a knob, but I really loved your cut/paste poetry sequel
7:38:12 PM Nastinchka: I do.
7:38:30 PM Nastinchka: see, the thing about you being a knob.
7:38:37 PM Nastinchka: Is that you recognize that you are a a knob readily.
7:38:40 PM Nastinchka: But it never
7:38:40 PM Nastinchka: ever
7:38:41 PM Nastinchka: ever
7:38:42 PM Nastinchka: changes.
7:38:46 PM Nastinchka: *incoherent sobbing*
7:38:48 PM Nastinchka: I GIVE
7:38:50 PM Nastinchka: AND I GIVE
7:38:51 PM 'Box: would it help if I said I"mhahhahahahaha
7:38:58 PM 'Box: I was going to type and you reduce me to thahahahahahaha
7:39:08 PM 'Box: no seriously, you're my daily goddamned hero
7:39:20 PM 'Box: I've just been really busy and lovelorn and at a job that makes me physically tired
7:39:26 PM Nastinchka: Tough.
7:39:39 PM 'Box: well. that's more or less what I expected to hear

5:11:42 PM Grubby: So. Miss's punter has a tiny little tattoo on his tiny little arm
5:11:43 PM Grubby: its so cute
5:11:54 PM Grubby: smaller than a business card
5:12:02 PM Nastinchka: twee!
5:12:05 PM Nastinchka: I bet it's a hummingbird
5:12:13 PM Grubby: this is the kinda coverage you just dont get on WIVK

During....some heartbreaking loss. I dunno. There were SO MANY.
1:13:41 PM Nastinchka: Oh, it is definitely time to go see MGoBlog's open thread.
1:14:41 PM Janie: *runs*
1:17:14 PM Janie: out of nowhere:
1:17:20 PM Janie: "Our crowd needs to take a page from ODB's rant at the start of "Brooklyn Zoo" to get pumped up before cheers."
1:17:35 PM Janie: When I think Ol' Dirty Bastard, I think Michigan.
1:18:21 PM Nastinchka: MICHIGAN IS FROM THE STREETS.

4:25:19 PM Jeebsy: I don't like it when my sweet girl feels bad.
4:25:33 PM Nastinchka: What about when I feel bad??
4:25:44 PM Jeebsy: That either.
4:25:44 PM Nastinchka: *blinkblink*
4:25:49 PM Nastinchka: At least I still have my sass.
4:25:59 PM Jeebsy: IT's the last thing to go.
4:26:24 PM Jeebsy: When you don't have your sass, I'll know it's time to make "the call" to OR.
4:27:45 PM Jeebsy: You're no good to me dead, sassafrass.
4:27:59 PM Nastinchka: That makes me sound like your sidekick in a western.
4:28:01 PM Nastinchka: I approve.
4:28:13 PM Jeebsy: You're no sidekick, darlin. You're the leading lady.
4:28:24 PM Jeebsy: If anything, I'm your henchman.
4:28:27 PM Nastinchka: I'm just saying, I like sassafrass.
4:28:31 PM Jeebsy: With a heart of coal.
4:28:32 PM Nastinchka: I get all the good lines.
4:28:40 PM Jeebsy: That you do.
4:28:47 PM Nastinchka: But you get the whores.
4:29:08 PM Jeebsy: Meh. So long as they deal me cards and make me bourbon, s'ok.
4:29:28 PM Nastinchka: WHORES THAT CAN MAKE BOURBON!
4:29:31 PM Nastinchka: There's our business model!
4:29:41 PM Jeebsy: I know!

10:45:24 AM Nastinchka: too early to type right.
10:46:08 AM Momma: it needs its beauty sleep
10:46:18 AM Nastinchka: Even though it is VERY PRETTY
10:46:39 AM Momma: and its baton is on fire

6:57:13 PM PB: Sigh
6:59:19 PM PB: How could ANYTHING be cathartic after you lose to Appy State? At home? In the season opener? The year you were supposed to contend for the national title?
6:59:52 PM Nastinchka: I am wallowing in his pain.
7:00:05 PM Nastinchka: Like crushing grapes for wine in onea' them bigass barrells.
7:00:07 PM Nastinchka: barrels
7:00:09 PM Nastinchka: *hic*

3:56:23 PM Nastinchka: I guess I could find some trips closer to home, go to a USC/UCLA game
3:56:32 PM Nastinchka: but there is just no CFB atmosphere anywhere in LA
3:56:46 PM Nastinchka: so instead I'm drinking a root beer float with 4 shots of skyy in it.
3:57:00 PM Jeebsy: That's the spirit. If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with.
3:57:17 PM Nastinchka: Or get GamePlan.

5:30:48 PM 'Box: OH OH OH
5:30:56 PM 'Box: I saw your Mom at Kroger yesterday
5:31:06 PM Nastinchka: AWWW!
5:31:23 PM 'Box: We passed each other simultaneously giving a mean stare until we recognized each other. We didn't make a single sound until we hugged.
5:31:35 PM 'Box: it was sweet.

11:19:14 AM Nastinchka: Announcer: "This is an area where Eli has struggled"
11:19:18 AM Nastinchka: What, playing quarterback?

6:03:53 AM Nastinchka: I....I don't remember ghostwriting for the WWL.
6:04:00 AM Nastinchka: Pasquarelli: " In a blowout in which the final score is 41-10, it's hard to identify a turning point, a precise snapshot where momentum charges inexorably in one franchise's direction. But for Colts coach Tony Dungy, there was no mystery about when Big Mo' moved to his sideline and established squatter's rights there."
6:04:40 AM Swindle: Pasquarelli is a tool
6:04:53 AM Swindle: A lardwrench, to be precise
6:05:29 AM Nastinchka: He's a Hutt.
6:06:18 AM Swindle: EH LENNYNOBATHA
6:06:24 AM Swindle: (eats frog)

9:56:23 AM PB: Yeah. I really do hate most of the gunners in my class, too. I'm sure some, though, are just into the material, like I am. Some, though, are clearly just gunning for top grades so they can get top jobs with top firms, blah blah die in a fire
9:57:06 AM Nastinchka: They call it a rat race because it's full of rats, darlin'. You just concentrate on being Indiana Jones (it is too early for metaphor).

3:04:30 PM Livia: Because I am dying to go back to New Orleans, but there is really no one else that I really want to go with
3:04:52 PM Nastinchka: And I have NEVER BEEN
3:05:28 PM Livia: And it would be dangerous and not fun to go alone.
3:06:16 PM Livia: Maybe if I took Squidley
3:06:31 PM Nastinchka: Not with ten thousand pink octopi could you do this.
3:06:56 PM Nastinchka: (Wait, that's not entirely true.)
3:07:31 PM Livia: Let's find out.

8:51:45 PM Spawn: : whyyyy can't I think of a single housing/uva regulation that prohibits strippers in the common room !!?!
8:51:44 PM Nastinchka: ...the interstate commerce act?
8:52:07 PM Spawn: unfortunately I think she's originating in charlottesville

110:56:18 AM Nastinchka: Have I ever told you about my aunt that may be the Mothman?
10:56:29 AM PB: ?!?
10:57:12 AM Nastinchka: Guess not.
10:57:19 AM Nastinchka: But boy was that a fun sentence to type.

8:02:41 PM Nastinchka: Him, I would do.
8:02:46 PM Nastinchka: In a heartbeat.
8:03:01 PM Nastinchka: Which, me being me, means he must NEVER KNOW.
8:03:39 PM Janie: Cracking UP. I know exactly what you mean.
8:03:59 PM Nastinchka: This is actually going to get complicated if it doesn't resolve itself.
8:04:39 PM Nastinchka: Must not allow hot blogger to know you actually would jump his ass.
8:05:15 PM Janie: So, WHEN you two meet, precautions must be taken.
8:05:26 PM Janie: Like, make him put a bag over his head
8:05:30 PM Nastinchka: Or something.
8:05:38 PM Janie: SHARK CAGE
8:05:40 PM Nastinchka: YES
8:05:57 PM Janie: You can circle, but you can't touch.
8:06:12 PM Nastinchka: ....Are we overthinking this?

6:30:23 PM Swindle: Dialogue plausibly asked and answered by Matt Grothe
6:30:33 PM Swindle: "Hey, you go home with that cougar?"
6:30:45 PM Nastinchka: "No, but I got to third with the puma."
6:30:52 PM Swindle: "The real puma"
6:30:59 PM Swindle: "it's like a cat and shit"
6:31:06 PM Swindle: "That's fucking sweet."

8:59:25 PM Nastinchka: Wait, y'all are going?
8:59:37 PM Livia: Not to that game, but to New Orleans, yes.
8:59:43 PM Nastinchka: Why didn't you tell me I woulda met you!
8:59:49 PM Livia: HOLLY
8:59:54 PM Livia: I TOLD YOU ABOUT THIS THREE MONTHS AGO
8:59:56 PM Livia: YOU SAID YOU COULDN'T COME!
9:00:02 PM Nastinchka: OH, you mean to the Saints game
9:00:03 PM Livia: BECAUSE OF THE BAMA GAME!
9:00:10 PM Nastinchka: I thought you meant Saturday
9:00:17 PM Livia: Yeah, we'll be there then too.
9:00:20 PM Nastinchka: Yeah, I'll have family stuff to do
9:00:24 PM Livia: We're gonna drink and eat our weight in gumbo all day.
9:00:29 PM Livia: And watch every single game.
9:00:39 PM Nastinchka: So close, yet unable to pet your nose. It's like that one movie where Michelle Pfeiffer turns into a bird at sunset.
9:00:48 PM Livia: What the fuck?
9:00:51 PM Livia: When does she do that?
9:01:02 PM Nastinchka: Ladyhawke! HelLO.
9:01:10 PM Nastinchka: (I may be making this up. Google it.)
9:01:12 PM Livia: I have never heard of this.
9:01:16 PM Livia: Is this like the Mant?
9:01:20 PM Nastinchka: IT IS COMING OUT OF THAT SCREEN ANY MINUTE.
9:01:28 PM Livia: "Shit, the credits are rolling...wait!"
9:02:02 PM Nastinchka: [hissssssssssss]

Posted by Nastinchka at October 22, 2007 11:39 PM