Snarkastic

I've been living here all my life.

"All men are equal not in respect of their gifts but in that everyone has a will capable of choice. Man is a tempted being, living with what he does, and suffers in time, the medium in which he realizes his potential character. The indeterminacy of time means that events never happen once and for all. The good may fall, the bad may repent, and suffering can be, not a simple retribution, but a triumph." -Auden

I was too busy running and hoping I didn't run out of luck

Once More, With Feeling

Hey, remember that time we were all posting about when/if we were going to be in town this weekend and then my site broke the internet? Yeah. So that's fixed, and with the exception of the comments on the last entry, all is restored. Let's try this one more time. Hit up the comment thread with some dates, stat.

I can't work under this kind of pressure

Got it bad?

Much love for the good wishes. Everything's fine, and all that that implies. And the last time I took a break, I came back with this, so it's clear there's no quitting. Unless I'm jinxing this by mere mention, there's another Something in the works, and I don't think it's very far away. It's swirling in my head right now, and has been for a couple days , but it's very hard to write about Art and Grieving and Delirium without succumbing to cliche or crippling self-doubt that pushes one to clinicism, and I'll not submit to either. I'm not afraid. When the time comes, it'll write itself.

It's a wonderful night for teeth

Crash and Burn

Caroline
is a Knoxvillian by birth, and a double major in English and Theatre at UT. This is her first ACT show. She would like to thank Patty, her favorite zoo monkey, for being her endless bowl of Nanner Puddin'. "Thanks to the most hilarious group of people I have ever encountered and am privileged to call cast members and friends. And thanks to Holly for having the courage and brilliance to cut the ropes and let us slam into the ceiling, throw up, scream, roll on the floor, make out, break out, and be the best. If this is 'furthering my education', then may I be a scholar forever."

RC
is one fine piece of sweet potato pie, but with fewer marshmallows and more carbohydrates. He smells nice and is good-looking in a non-threatening way. Sometimes the snow comes down in June; sometimes the sun goes 'round the moon. Do not feed RC after midnight. RC's hobbies include inappropriate ad-libbing, passive-aggressiveness, and doin' it right on the wrong side of town. Tonight, he will be your naughty girl.

Sean
is never going to see any of you again, but he would like you to know that he is v. pretty. He is also the second coming, so be well prepared to serve him in the future. He loves you all and wants you also to know that he will be changing his sex in three days, so that if you try and find him, you will fail.

JP
is the last of the Mohicans. He first appeared on the pages of Playgirl in 1984 and went on to write Black Like Me. He has never appeared before a live audience that was not looking at him from behind a small square window. He can kill a yak from 400 yards with mind-bullets! He would like to thank his parents for not ignoring the voices in his head.

Jess
Jess was picked up off the side of I-40 due to her amazing 'hitchhiking' abilities, which explains her lack of acting abilities. Although she's never done theatre before, she plans to be uber famous. She gives all credit for her accomplishments (or lack thereof) to the casting couch. Special thanks to the 80's, Chekhov, her mom, and Holly, "I guess".

Alexandria
is a 19-year-old freshman in pre-med at UT. She has previously appeared in Steel Magnolias, Little Women, and Back County Crimes. She's single, boys, so enjoy the costume.

Hunter
is very, very pretty. No, like, man-pretty. Just ask him. No, seriously, Ask Him. NO. ASK HIM...hey, where are you going?

Genny
is not this scary in real life. Just look in her eyes. Those cold, black, staring, dead eyes. Like a doll's eyes. She has most recently torn up the stage as a singing, dancing, whomp & stomping hooker in The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas at the ORPH. Thanks to her sister, the cast, and TC for the inspiration.

Big Evil
on the other hand, is this scary in real life. Not since Mop-n-Glo added their new orange scent has a shiny surface gleamed with such tantalizing promise of sweat & Tang. When not combating alien armadas, he waits in his geosynchronously orbiting satellite, ready to come to the aid of Earth once more.

Larry
Larry Williams Jr., a senior majoring in theatre and also studying cinema, dance and music at UT. He is happy to be returning to the Black Box theatre where he was last seen in The Hobbit as the dragon Smaug. You may have last seen Larry in the role of Theo in The Underpants for ACT. Upcoming projects include directing The Accomplice, and No Exit. After graduation Larry hopes to pursue an MFA in theatre. Larry would like to thank his parents for always supporting him, and extend a special thanks to all his wonderful friends for "being there. I love you all."

Ashley-Paige
is grateful to be playing a part that in no way challenges her morals. She would like to thank Manolo Blahnik, Chris, Peyton Manning, and her Real Mothers, Holly and Joan. Love and kisses to the Best. Cast. Ever!!

Sandy
appreciates the fact that no one in the cast has bothers to try to entertain her with lines such as "Huh huh, it's Greek to me" and "Ha ha, Sandy Geek, ha ha". Being from Texas she was also pleased to find the "Did you ride a horse to school?" and "Can I borrow your cowboy boots?" remarks have FINALLY subsided. Love to the cast and crew.

Kali
Is best known for her performance as Keiko's body double in Free Willy. She would like to thank Sam Walton and the Nation of Islam.

Holly
is ten feet tall, bulletproof, and Silently Judging You. She loves West Coast offense, kickin' it promo-style, and the power of an elegant turn of phrase and a grin (all evidence in this show to the contrary), and endorses Tang, the drink of astronauts. More love than is strictly reasonable to the Hive and her eucalyptus trees, who know who they are. "I'm not at all sure I should be labeled as the director. When confronted with talent of this magnitude, my job is reduced to little more than hand signals and crowd control. All my love, then, in order of appearance, to Caroline, RC, Sean, JP, Jess, Alexandria, Hunter, Genny, Big Evil, Larry, Ashley-Paige, Sandy, and Kali, the most amazing co-directors these Crazy Eyes have ever seen."

And this should've gone in the program and didn't, but UberMensch medals to Big Evil, JP, and RC, for taking everything I threw at them in WASP, turning around, and coming right back for another show and more of the same. Love y'all.

Or was that what you meant by incendiary?

Oh, for fuck's sake.

It is a mark of what kind of week it's been that I haven't said anything about the show. I still have a line in my posts-in-waiting text file that says something like "Oh yeah, and I'm directing again", but after tonight it's out of my hands:

There. So right now I'm in the middle of my second consecutive all-night ProcrastiNation-induced study sprint. The good news? I'm comfily ensconced in the Melrose lab, like in days of yore, with Lauren and Bennett for company, streaming my favorite Atlanta station and making this research cry like a little girl. I was reunited with Black Lightning. Abstaining from caffeine has made its effect on my system all the more potent when I relapse. Let's see. I've got mails. I'm getting punchy. First email......Hi, Tolsun!! Next email....Holy hell (thanks, Big Evil). Yeah. The syntax terrorists have clearly won.

Come see my play. I have abominably talented friends. Also, there's a Strong Bad monologue. No, forserious. And if that doesn't convince you, well, gosh, Jed, I don't even wanna know you.

I can't believe I let you put your tongue in my mouth

Once Upon A Time

And you think of all of the things you've seen
And you wish that you could live in between
And you're back again, only different than before

To be continued

Requiem for "I have a dream"

But what they meant was 'Buccaneer'

Today's Special:

• What Jeremy said.
• What Sars said (last letter).
• What a Salon reader said, via Cara.
• As ever, what Adam said.
• Most especially, read this. As it happens, the letter sent to supporters is the text of Kerry's concession speech, which, in case you missed it, was......something. But what Dan said back was even better.
• Oh, and what Stewart said.

I'm perversely glad it was so dark all day. Highest voter turnout since 1968, and we've never had it so bad. Thirty minutes after the concession announcement, two and a half hours before the speech Kerry made about healing and unity, Republican Senate leaders were on cable shilling for an "aggressive agenda" that included bans on gay marriage and abortion, the right-wingening of the Supreme Court, and drilling in Alaska. Every timethey said "mandate", I died a little. An hour later and those same leaders were blaming Alan Keyes' loss on 'name recognition', no lies. An hour and forty-five minutes later they started talking about Hillary. Five hours later and there's a special on 'media grading'...done by Wolf Blitzer. I watched West Wing, and there were doves in CJ's fishbowl. I go to type 'with', and 'without' appears on the screen. I want to form a Future Expatriates of America Federation. What must the rest of the world think, seeing that half of us condone this mocracy of demockery? How do you put one foot in front of the other and force air into your lungs in a country that doesn't belong to you anymore?

I made it that far before realizing that my life could not be dictated by grief that was two hours old. So I gave those hours over to mourning. Then five to school, and two to the theatre.

Tonight, I give to getting up off the mat.

Tomorrow, I give to the good fight. Tomorrow, and the next day, and the next.

I'll be on the verandah, since you're already on the cross.

Watch This.

Haec credam a deo pio?

A deo iusto, a deo scito?

Cruciatus in crucem.

Tuus in terra servus, nuntius fui.

Officium perfeci.

Cruciatus in crucem.

Eas in crucem.

Snark the Vote

While logic and the media would have us believe we won't have results for weeks, I can't shake this feeling that it's not going to be as close as we think.

That said, my (uncharacteristically and illogically optimistic) picks for the evening are:

Kerry: Washington, Oregon, California, Hawaii, New Mexico, Minnesota, Iowa, Wisconsin, Illinois, Michigan, Ohio, Maine, Vermont, New Hampshire, New York, Pennsylvania, Maryland, Massachusetts, Delaware, New Jersey, Connecticut, Rhode Island, Florida

Bush: Alaska, Montana, North Dakota, South Dakota, Idaho, Wyoming, Nevada, Utah, Arizona, Colorado, Nebraska, Kansas, Oklahoma, Texas, Missouri, Arkansas, Louisiana, Indiana, Kentucky, West Virginia, Virginia, North Carolina, South Carolina, Tennessee, Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi

Be of good cheer. We did what we could, and more. It's a hell of a thing.

C'est la guerre